- At the local park, as we walked by on way to potty, an older woman sitting on a bench said "He's beautiful. How long have you been together as a family?" I gasped. Thanked her for saying it that way. Not sure if I answered her actual question.
- Holding a yard sale at my brothers, my son and nephew were gallivanting about the yard in mischievous 4yo fun. A young woman holding her young 18 mo stopped by. We talked a while. I helped her find some things as her hands were full with baby. After hearing Teg scream "Momma!" about 400 times in 10 minutes, she also said "He's beautiful. How old is he? Is he your only child?" Then she offered that she had a 6 yo in the car watching a movie. They had adopted him through foster care. We had a wonderful conversation. She stayed for an hour (older child obviously got out of the car and played with the two 4yos). She is now a good friend and supportive person in our lives.
I make these long illustrations to say- most of my rude comments haven't been from strangers. But I read about them on the interwebs and like to think I'm somewhat prepared for when they will occur.
... umm... or maybe I'm just a donkey and am trying to stir up trouble? Case in point. Opining. (and no- none of you that comment here were part of my thinking with that post.
Yesterday at our local grocery store, I was shocked and AMAZED that a beautiful brown skinned man was at the seafood counter. Not initially planning on getting seafood, our plans changed immediately!! (don't forget- we are sooo lily white here- it's practically a transparent state). Teg, pushing the cart, was quite active and vocal as he went a little further to use the hand sanitizer station (those automatic dispensers are like crack for 4yo boys).
The gentleman leaned forward tilted his chin at Teg and said "Helping out today?"
You: envying my highly developed conversational nuances
He repeated the chin nod "Helping out today?"
Perhaps I'm hard of hearing. Or perhaps my head was filled with screams of joy that "THERE IS ANOTHER BLACK MAN IN THIS STORE! YAYAYAYAYAY" Either way, I responded....
Me: "Am I helping out? Oh. No. He is my son."
Him: "Yes. Is he helping YOU out? You'll end up with extra things in your cart." (laughing... attempting a joke on kids and grocery stores...)
(Recognizing myself as a jackass. Teg has hollered "Momma" at least 5 times in this 20 second interaction. The man KNOWS he's my son.)
Me: "Oh. Yes. That does happen from time to time."
I'm just calling it as 'practice' for when an ACTUAL inquisitor presents oneself.
And now I have to find a new grocery store.